Hear me out. There are many good reasons to eat: Hunger, boredom, wanting to be the world's fattest man. But not revenge.*

So this isn’t a food blog, but I am sharing a recipe anyways. One huge problem I believe all ex-pats experience (and probably one of the biggest ones) is missing food from home. No matter how much you love your adoptive culture and even if you love the food, you will have moments where you crave a “taste of home”.

It’s almost the Superbowl. To be honest I don’t typically watch it, but talk of it has got me thinking of “game day foods.” I am majorly craving Buffalo wings! However, I have two vegetarians in the family and I never make meat at home (I haven’t touched raw chicken in 5.5 years-which is nice).

So I looked around for inspiration but lots of recipes with cauliflower also attempt to be healthy-to be honest, I was more concerned with matching my craving than making sure it was healthy so here’s what I came up with. **The recipe geared towards people in Germany so I tried to put equivalent ingredients in parentheses.**

Ingredients:

• 1 med head of cauliflower (mine was about 800g after the base was removed)

• 1 cup white flour (I used type 405)

• 1 cup milk

• 1/2 tsp RauchSalz (smoked salt, liquid smoke probably works too but then add maybe 1/4 tsp salt and a few drops)

• 1/2 tsp black pepper

• 1/2 tsp garlic powder

• 1-2 cups of Panier Mehl (or panko type crumbs if you can find them)

For the Sauce

• 58g (aka 1/4 cup) butter

• 1/2 cup Franks Red hot original

Remove cauliflower stem and separate into florets, preferably about double the size of a cherry tomato size-too small will burn, too big it won’t be crispy enough. Mix together dry ingredients (except bread crumbs) for batter then whisk in milk.
Prepare a shallow bowl with 1 cup of bread crumbs (add more as needed) Coat the cauliflower in batter then transfer to bread crumbs and coat carefully and place on a lined cookie sheet (you can use a silpat mat or something like aluminum foil) repeat until done (you may need two sheets) then place in the freezer for 20-30 minutes (OK I know this part is difficult with tiny European freezers. I’m sorry! I actually have lived here long enough that I bought myself an American sized deep freeze that I keep in my cellar room) . You don’t wanna leave them too long you just kind of want to freeze the outer coating if you freeze the cauliflower on the inside then it might not cook through. If you skip the step what will probably happen is that some of the coating will come off into the oil and make a mess in the oil and maybe not fully coat the cauliflower once it’s done. Mine stayed together so the outside was crispy and the inside was soft.

Make the sauce while your cauliflower coating is freezing. Super simple. Melt butter over medium low heat until melted. Remove from heat and whisk in hot sauce. This is a very simple recipe-you can embellish with other spices if you want maybe Worcestershire sauce or little bit of extra vinegar but I just wanted very basic.

Now here comes the unhealthy part. Heat a deep fryer or a pot of oil (with a high smoke point-I find peanut or canola works fine- don’t use olive oil-it will smoke!) at least deep enough to be about double the width of your largest cauliflower piece to 190°C (375°F). Once the coating is cold fry in batches for about 3 minutes or until deep golden brown. Drain on a paper bag or paper towels.

When you have fried all of them place them in a large bowl and pour the sauce over and mix it around to coat them.

Serve with Ranch dressing if possible (I know it’s hard to find (American Caesar from Kaufland would be an okay substitute, or try making Ranch from scratch). Pretend you’re at a Superbowl Party with all your friends and enjoy!

*Quote from Futurama Season 2 Ep 18